In my favorite BBC version of “Pride and Prejudice,” Elizabeth Bennett remains standing, which prevents the odious Mr. Collins from taking a seat. By custom and tradition in Western culture, a man could not and should not sit down while a woman is standing. My husband does not sit down at the dinner table until all the women are seated and he always helps the female guest of honor to her seat first.
This seating tradition may seem quaint, but it requires the men to honor and respect the women in the room. The woman comes first. Yes, the rule is old-fashioned and it is neither “equality” nor “equity”. So why would anyone be surprised today when prominent men ignore a woman who is left standing while they comfortably seat themselves?
Ursula von der Leyen, the president of the European Union’s executive branch, was left standing alone recently while President Recep Erdogan of Turkey and Charles Michel, the Belgian president of the European Council, sat down and ignored her. “I felt hurt and left alone: as a woman and as a European,” she said.
European women are blaming sexism and using the Twitter hashtag #GiveHerASeat. Really, they should be blaming feminism that excuses men for maltreating women and encourages men to pretend that there are no biological differences between men and women.
No one should be surprised that a 45-year-old Belgian man, who has been trained to treat women like men, would ignore the woman in the room. No one should be surprised that a Muslim man would ignore the woman in the room. Ms. Von der Leyen has an opportunity to use diplomatic protocol to reassert the respect that all men should give to all women – not just high-ranking leaders.
After all, would Margaret Thatcher ever have tolerated a man who ignored her?
